Day 13 of Treatment.

May 6, 2011

    I haven’t updated you on my physical condition here at the Notdisneyworld Sober Ranch for a while. Let’s rectify that real quick-like. To review, in pictures:

    I’m here:

Florida has 1,800 miles of coastline. I am near some of it.

I am taking this:

To prevent this.

As represented here:

Gimme a “W!” Gimme an “I!” Gimme a “T!”…

I started at 24 milligrams a day (ah, the good old days) and am now down to 12 milligrams a day, or, one-and-a-half of these:

Seven bucks apiece. That’s a meal, homey.

As a result, I find that I am very:

I miss Dopey.

I also find that I am a tad:


With a little bit of luck, any day now, I will feel like this guy:

Happy Dwarf.

But never again this guy:

DOPEY!!! Hi old friend.

      Now that I have incorporated Sleepy, Grouchy, Happy and Dopey Dwarf (is “Dwarf” their last name?) into a blog about drug addiction, I expect to be getting a cease-and-desist letter from Disney’s attorneys any day now. Not to worry, I got just the guy:

“You know what? Don’t get too close to me. ’Cause I’ve got an itch you can’t believe. I think something laid eggs on me.”

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